Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
