And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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