I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize
