my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
