I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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