Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
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I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
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The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.