what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Randomize
