After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
