im about as happy as oj after his trial
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country