she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Your mouth is God's brothel.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life