Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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