Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
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