I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
