Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Randomize
