Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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