i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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