Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
