just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize