Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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