flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
