its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize