we have pet lesbian snakes
I'm lost and stupid without you.
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize