the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize
