gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Green mimosas i think yes
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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