we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
