are you still at the devil's house?
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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