UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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