So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
