but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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