Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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