Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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