i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
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I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
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Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize