just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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