Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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