I'm really into asian looking animals
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
