my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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