I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
