I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
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