Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
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