Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
it hurts more in the daytime
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize