I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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