guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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