I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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