it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
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