this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
