I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
