bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
