YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
