It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
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I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
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I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.