I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Its about making memories worth repressing
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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