Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
