Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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